Sunday, March 25, 2007

i have great plans for the weekend, intending to utilise every minute of it catching up with my homework. Alas, once at home, my laziness creeps in and wasted a beautiful Saturday away!

I admire those people with discipline to be up to date with their work. I think that it has become such a addictive habit for me to "relax" over the weekend that I just can''t seem to break the momentum. Humans are creatures of habit, and it is really hard for me to embrace change.

Goals set, but put aside. Statements made, but left forgotten. How I wish I can alter my brainwaves to focus on the important and essential things, and not read comics, take afternoon naps, watch anime, surf the internet and blog!

well, i'll probably have more time to blog after the exams... OH SHIT EXAMS!!

hai!

Wednesday, March 14, 2007

I was taking a break from the accounting tutorial just now, and started day dreaming.

I dreamt of a really funny incident.

I was 19 years old then, a freshly minted officer barely 2 months old in my new unit. I went to the army market in Lavender to get some "barang barang" for the upcoming field camp. I remembered vivdly asking the Indian shopkeeper, "Uncle, snake powder how much?". I can't remember the price, but whatever the price is, I told him that it is too high and quoted him a lower price.

In the army market, it is well known that you should bargain so as to get the best bang out of your NSF allowance. Being a sucker for tradition, I bargained with the Uncle too.

The Uncle, however, is a seasoned shopkeeper, AKA lao jiao, who doesn't take kindly to kids bargaining. He pointed to another stall and told me with a very straight face," Boy, that shop much cheaper. Go there la!"

Being the naive 19 year old that I was, I thanked the Uncle and approached that shop. A query for the price of the snake powder turned my cheerfulness into shock, shame and anger. The price was at least 50% higher than Uncle's!

I spun around and saw the Uncle laughing, gesturing to his colleagues and pointing at me. Obviously, this damn fuck here was the butt of his joke.

Now, that I think about it, it was really funny. However, at that point of time, I would admit that it really affected me. I was naive, unbelievably naive and believed that all people are saints. I trusted every word they say as I think they have no reason to lie to me. When I was young, the adults say that honesty is the best policy. If you want people to trust you, you must trust them. and all the ya da ya da. Unfortunately, I must have forgotten to read the fine print. I was that gullible.

3 years later, I am probably the most naive person around at age 22. yeah, of course I don't believe ridiculous crap, but well, it is probably easier to make me fall for a lie than (insert your most far fetched goal here).

I really hope that there are no hidden agendas when people are talking to you. I want to believe that all people are sincere and really want to know you better. I want to believe that they want to know me because I am a interesting friend, not because I have 1 million bucks or because I know this hot girl that you desperately want to fuck.

But who am I to complain when I am guilty of having a hidden agenda too?

Someone once said that he will want to remain as a 19 year old kid forever, because adults have too many problems.

Sometimes, I really agree with him.

Oh well, perhaps I am being too cynical here. Of course, there are many friends around me who are nice, interesting people. I really want to look at this world without tinted goggles. Can I talk to the real person inside of you and not your fucking mask?

Oh dear, I better stop swearing. Come to think of this, what triggered this off anyway? hmmmmmmmm...... oh well.... time to chiong my accounting tutorial!

Saturday, March 03, 2007

1 of my friends from the army gave me a testimonial (friendster... is it still the trend now?? haha)

a short, simple one. Yet it brought back so many memories. Tekong rambutans are the best that I have eaten. So are the durians!

1 of my former recruit gave me a testimonial too.

2 sentences long, and it made my day (or night).

I looked through the photos taken in those 2 years, it really seem so fun and exciting. Of course, with the benefit of hindsight.

I remembered waiting anxiously for my ORD Date. Now that I'm "free", why do I still feel that something is lacking?

Haha, maybe I should go back to army...... maybe not.